What meets the eye...

What meets the eye...

Look me in the eye. What do you see? A happy little girl, smileing back at you? A sweet lagh and long blond hair? They say that the eyes are the windows to the soul. But if you see a happy girl by looking deep into my eyes; you are so wrong. When I look in the mirror I see anger. A unknown face. Disepointment. Regrets. Lonelyness. Not a bright smile and shine hair. So now look me in the eye. What do you see? Can you see who I am? Who am I?

It started when my parens and I went for a trip to Bermuda. We had never traveled over sea before and all of us were really exited. We had eaven rentet the cutest little house were we were going to stay for two hwole weeks. Just mum, dad and me. Like we used to before grandmother suddenly pased away two years ago. After her suddent death mum was so mad and didnt lissen to anybody. She had just blocked everyone out and sat in her bed for months. It was a horrible time for all of us. Spesialy for mum. But now she was so much bether and she smiled again. She eaven made brabefest sometimes and went with me to the mall. It was good to have her back.

The trip started in Cuba. Not far awey form Bahamas really. But we were goning all the way to Bermuda. Like a big happy family of thre people loveing echother. We went on the chip and found oure room. It wasn't a big room, but it was cind of cosy. It was a very small room with three beds, and an eaven smaller bathroom and a tiney tyney closet that proberbly was just big anough to fit my bag. So I pushed my stuff under my bed in the corner. «Im so glad we're just staying here for one night,» dad said. «or else I think I would choke in here.» we all laghed. It wans'nt funny really, but we knew that dad thought it was so mum and I just laghed to be polight and dad belived it every time.

The first day was cind of boring. We didn't do much. Well.. It wasn't much to do eather, so I sat in the room reading this book allmost the whole day. The book were called ''Flinght 19''. the title hadn't realy got to me. But the school insisted that we read a book in the summer vication so I just grabed the first I saw and went home. When I started reading, it was all about this flight mition from Florida thet went wrong. It realy got to me. It was like I have ben reading for a minute and when I looked at the clock I had ben sitting there for three or foure hours. It was an amasing book. And I loved it. Spesialy sinse it was all about the Bermuda Treangle that went from Miami to San Juan to Bermuda. Whate a minute! Bermuda? That's were I was heading. From Cuba to Bermuda. I found a map that lied in the draer to see where we were heading. I draw the lines from Bermuda to San Juan and Miami. It formed a Treangle. Oh my God! We were heading rigt into the Bermuda Treangle!

When mum and dad came back to the room I told them what I had foud out, but they didn't belive me. «It's just a story, deare. Nothing to be afraid of.» But I wasn't so shore. What if it was true? What if we went to oure dedth and I was the only one to know? What was I going to do? No.. I should lisen to dad. It was only a silly book. Maybe there were many stories about planes, ships and peoples that had ben missing in this spesific area, but that didn't mean they were all true. Fishermen and plane disepare all the time, never to be sean again. It didn't mean that this place were spesyally exposed. It was just a silly story. But still, I didn't want to sleep that nigtht. I just lied awake in my bed stearyng at the roof. Praying that nothing wrong would happend.

Orund 7 AM I was waked by a door slamming. I'm not realy that jumpy but right now I was. My eies were wide open and my heart were beating like a horrorkane. I thougt it was just a bad dream and were about to go back to sleep when I notices something were missing. Or more spesific, -someone! My mum and dad was gone. I didn't think that it could have any normal explination at the time, like they had went to the bar or someting like that, and that was good, because it was noting like that, had hapen either. I trew on a big jacket and went out looking for my parents.

I went into the passage. «Hello? Anyone here?» I wispered. I didn't want to wake anyone in case they were all sleeping. I walked softly on my toes, trying not to make a single sound. I passed many other rooms. Some of the doors were closed, and some were open. I realy din't want to look inside the open-door rooms, but I did anyway. No one to see anywere. All the rooms were empty. «Something must be wrong,» I said to myselfe. «this isn't right.»

I kept on walking in the dark passage in my big, big jacket and my wide open eies, trying to find the stares that led to the uper deck, but I couldn't seem to finde them anywere. Suddenly I heared something. I turned around realy fast. Like when you get youre fingers burned and you automaticly snap youre hand away from the heat. Where did the sound come from? I stood totaly still. I didn't eaven take a singel breath. There it was again! It came from one of the crossing passages. I locked around and slowly I creeped in the diraction of the sound. It was like someone tride to come out. Hiting and scratshing the door in a desperate need of getting out. I saw a door moveing. Getting pushed out like when you push a door with all youre strength but without tuching the door handle. It stoped for some seconds and then it started again. It repited itselfe meny times and I jumped everytime.

Then I stood rigt in front of the door. My knees were shakeing so bad that they olmost drowned the noice from the room. I decided to take town the door handle and see wat was inside. I toock a step back and lent forwerd to reach the door handle. I tuched it with one of my fingers and later my whole hand were rapped tightly around it. My hand was swetty and my breath went thick like I was about to fade. I figured that it was much beter to just throw up the door, then to open it slowly. Who- or whatever that was incide this room proberly wanted to get the hell away from this room, so if I opened the door slowely I would just get the door in my face.

I took a big, last breth before I went for the door. I knew in my heart that this was all so wrong. That I realy shouldn't open this door, but something inside me told me that I had to find out what's behind this door. I pulled down the door handle. The door were slammed up, but not by me. I took a few steps back until I hit the wall behind me. I was like glued to the wall. With wide open eies I was wateing for what was incide the room, but nothing happend. It was so quiet that you would jump to the moon just by hearing a single pin hit the floor.

Suddenly a blach shadow run out of the room. I went cold as ice while I still were glude to the wall. What ever runed out of the room, it stoped just a few doors away. I steard at the creature. «What are you?!» I screamed. But it didn't answer. It just stared at me like it never had seen a liveing humen beaing before. For all I know, it might not.

I started to relise that the ting that looked at me actually were a humen beaing itselfe. Why not? The boat were floating around in the middle of the Bermuda Treangle. How can I know this thing weren't a person who just have ben hypnotized or something like that. The more I thougt about it, the more sertent I got. The thing looking at me, weren't a ting, but a pasanger on this ship to Bermuda, just as I was. The only thing was that it didn't behave like a human. It was breathing heverly and bend forword with its arm hanging almost in the grown. More like a zombie, like you see in all the old, bad horror movies.

Suddenly the thing started running again. I figuured out it was best to just go back to my room, but when have I ever done what's best? I run after it. Up the stares to the uper deck and all the way to the tip of the ship.

All the passangers were gatherd togeter and just stood there locking into the wather and makeing this horrible sounds. Like they were all handicapped and chokeing at the same time. Suddenly I saw that one of the things or zomies or what ever this was jumping over bord. Into the sea. Then an other one and an other one. In just seconds, halfe the people had jumped into the ocean. Thats when I got the eie on my parents. I ran to them and tried to make them come with me. But they didn't eaven seem to notice that I was there. I whaved my hans in front of them and tried to drag them back to the room. But they didn't move an inche. It was like they hade got paranormal strenth and were just glued to the floor like the tables on McDonals. I was so terrefied. Scared that this was the end of everything.

My parents started walking to the very tip of the chip. I drag theyr arms, but it had no afect what so ever. And then. They jumped. Just like that. Not eaven a single goodbye. They just jumped over bord never to be seen again. Like I wasn't there. Like they didn't care that I saw the hole thing. They just jumped. And that was it. No more mum and dougter shopping. No more dad singing while makeing brakefest. No more us. Ever!

So now when you look into a pritty, little girls shiny, blue eyes, don't let the first thing you notice be her looks, her body or her hair. If you look a little deeper into her eyes, you might see the story thats behind them. So look me in the eye. What do you see? This beautiful blue eyes have seen horrible things. Things you only can imagen. Can you see it? The terrifyed look she's giveing you? I'm telling you my story to warn you. This place is nothing to joke with. You might think it's just a horror story about a little girl who want some atention. But this is real. This place exsists. So look me in the eie, now, and tell me what you see. This eyes carry meny seacrets. Some are told and some are never to be released.

LIKE VOKSEN SOM SIN EGEN MOR

Like voksen som sin egen mor

Hun var bare 6 år da hun først forsto hvor alvårlig det virkerlig var. Det var i 6 år det hadde pågått, men nå hadde det gått for langt. Hun kunne ikke gjøre noe med det heller. Hun var jo bare 6 år. 6 ÅR! Hvordan kunne noen gjøre dette mot henne? En liten, søt jente med blonde krøller og alltid en liten silkesløyfe i håret. Ingen kunne tro at det var noe galt med henne, eller familien hennes. Ingen kunne tro at hun opplevde slik en tragedie, men det gjorde hun. Den snille, glade jenta som man ble så fort glad i. Som hilset på hvert menneske hun møtte og aldri sa hade uten en klem. Men så var det da slik at denne skjønne jenta var akkuratt henne som opplevde dette. Bare 6 år. Og mer ble hun ikke.

Det vr første skoledag og lille Elise gledet seg spent til å få hilse på alle de nye vennene hun skulle få. Møte lærere og se den store skolen hun enderlig skulle få lov å gå på. Hun gledet seg så utrolig mye. Magen stramte seg og hun fikk en stor gledes-klump i halsen. Hun smilte så fælt at hun nesten holdt på å revne i ansiktet. Sommerfuglene i magen svirret like fort som da hun kjørte karusellene i lekeland. Hun gledet seg så inderlig mye.

Hun tittet inn på stua. TV'n sto på fotball på full guffe som den alltid gjorde. Hun så en diger, mørkegrønn stol og der satt faren. Bakover lent med bena på en fuff. Bare i boxeren og en grisete hvit trøye. Siklet. Bordet var en gang dekket med en hvit blondeduk som moren hadde heklet til jul i fjord, men nå var borde overfyllt av tomme ølbokser og en hel hau med skittne tallerkner. Man kunne se den store magen til faren stikke ut under trøya og hun visste at hvis han hadde klart å bøye seg lutt fremover så kunne man sett den dire rørlegger-sprekken hans. En helt vanlig morgen for Elise. Glad og redd på samme tid. Hun kunne aldri vite helt sikkert når faren var i hvilket humør. Det eneste hun kunne håpe på var at moren ikke måtte en tur på do eller hente noe hun hadde glemt igjen på soverommet. Da kunne hun stå skjelvn og stirre på faren med store øyne. Livredd. Hver gang han bevegde seg eller grynta ett av de heslige gryntene hans, skvatt hun til og gispet. Hun var kunn et lite barn. Et barn som fryktet over sitt eget liv.

Moren tok Elise hart i armen. Ikke hart sånn at det gjorde vondt, men sånn for å holde henne ordentlig fast i tillfelle faren pluttserlig skulle finne på noe rabalder. Hun leiet henne ut og lokket døren forsiktig igjen bak seg. Nå kunne hun puste lettet ut. Faren var aldri utenfor huset. Elise kunne kjenne at moren slappet mer av. Var ikke like anstrengt. Musklene var ikke spent og tennene var ikke knepet sammen. Moren rettet på hatten og kneppet open ordentlig igjen. Baset seg vei gjennom snøen. Elise smilte. Fanget snøfnugg på tungen men hun lo og hoppet lekende. "visste du at ingen snøfnugg er like, mamma?" lo hun og tittet opp på moren som smilte stivt tilbake. "nei, jenta mi. Er det sant? Hvordan vet du det da?" "Henrik fortalte det. Han som jobber nede på butikken." hun lo en liten skvett og dro lua langt ned i ansiktet. "ååå! Mamma, se! Jeg er en blånisse, ser du det?" moren smilte lettere. Det var godt å ha en slik gladjente til datter i en ellers så stressende hverdag.

Elise visste godt hva som ventet henne hjemme. Og moren visste ikke hvor lenge hun kunne holde ut. De var begge redde. Elise visste det. Hun visste hun måtte være sterk for mamma. Være en liten engel. Ikke gjøre noe galt. Ikke en gang slit som 6-åringer skal gjøre. Slite hull i alle de nye buksene og komme hjem fra skolen helt nedgria i sand og gjørme. Elise var en vakker pike. Gikk alltid i de flotte kjolene sine og nypolerte, sorte lakksko som moren hadde kjøpt til henne. Slev på vinteren gikk hun slik. Som nå. Som en skikkerlig dame. Ikkeno aking eller sølekake på denne jenta, nei. Da ble det trøbbel.

Moren forlatet ikke jenta si et sekund når de var hjemme. Når faren hadde sett på fotballen hele dagen og var sur og irritert over at Rosenborg tapte 2-1 over Molde, var det aldri lett å si hvordan kvelden vill ende. Hadde Elise bare sett alvåre i det hele. Før det var for sent. Kunne historien kanskje vert litt anderledes. En liten jente som henne visste ikke bedre. Hun trodde at alle hadde det akkuratt som henne, men slik var det ikke.

Når første skoledagen var slutt og Elise og moren kom hjem, var ikke faren i godstolen sin. Moren grep rundt datteren og holdt henne tett inntil seg. Pulsen steg og tårene sprang automatisk på bak øynene. Elise kjente moresn hjerte hamre som en flokk gale kjyr og de store armene stramme seg rundt henne i angst. Livredd for hva faren ville gjøre da han så at de var hjemm uten at han var i den faste plassen forran TV'n. Hjertene hamret om hverandre og pusten ble kald som is. Hele rommet tok en aketur ned Mount Everest og hodene ble kastet rundt i en vill basketballkamp. De hørte at faren trakk ned på doen og låsen ble vridd om. Elise sperret opp øynene og morens hender skalv rundt henne. "hva i helvete e det dere gjør her?!!" skrek han og klastet moren i fjeset. Hun tok seg til skinnet og kjente pulsen hamre i hele ansiktet. "nei, hold deg unna Elise!! hun har ikke gjort noe!!" skrek hun da faren satte seg ned på huk mot den vesle piken. Elise løftet armen forran munnen, liksom for litt beskyttelse. "hva er det du gjør?!! se pappan din rett i øyna nå!!" Elise stirret og stirret. Hun hadde hørt at øynene var vinduene til skjelen, men hun kunne ikke se annet enn to digre svarte flekker som lynte mot henne. "har ikke du sjel, pappa?" hvisket hun. "HVA?! SJEL?! HVA ER DETTE FOR NOE DRITTPREIK?!" han grep tak i armen hennes og klemte til alt han kunne. "den drittskolen har forgiftet sinnet til godjenta mi! Jeg sa vi ike skulle sende henne i en slik tortur!" han skrek og bar seg mens han tok de store hendene sine og klemte fast i ansiktet hennes. Tårene hennes andt nedover skinnene hennes. "mamma! Det gjør vondt! Hjelp meg!" hylte hu helt hjelpesløst. Moren styrtet mt den vesle piken men faren sparket henne vekk. "DRITTKJÆRRING!! Dette hodler du deg unna! Det var du som ville sende henne på den dritten! Ikke jeg! SE HVA DU HAR GJORT!" "men jeg," "hold kjeft, ingen har sagt at kan si noe!" elise prøvde å vri seg unna farens grep men til ingen nytte. "prøver du å slippe unna, nå?! Hæ, hæ? Gjør du det?! Tror du du kommer deg vekk herifra kanskje?! Hæ? Tror du det?! Hæ? SVAR MEG DA DIN JÆVLA DRITTUNGE!!!!... TROR DU DEEEEET!!!?"han tok tak i håret hennes og slang henne i bakken. "MAMMA HJELP MEEEG!!" skrek hun. Hjertetkjærende lød hylene hennes som ekko mellom veggene. Hun løp gråtende vekk. Så fort hun kunne. Men faren løp etter. Heiv seg mot de skjøre bena hennes. Røsket e det gyldene håret. Sparket og slo. Hylte og skrek.

Den vesle jenta skulle ikke få en ny soloppgang. Det siste hun så var farens åpne mund og digre øyne som hamret løs i sinne. Det siste hun kjente var farens harde slag mot hodet som stilnet bråket. Det siste hun følte var redsel og anger. Anger over at hun måtte gjøre disse ngene mot moren. Hvorfor var hun slik en dorlig person? Hvorfor gjorde hun alle disse gale tingene? Som å snakke når faren snakket, eller smile når faren så på. Hvorfor gjorde hun dette? Fordi det er det småbarn gjør. Leker og koser deg. Selv om Elise aldri ble mer enn 6 år, fikk hun alikevel oppleve å være voksen.